the worst part about weddings...

...is that everyone complains about everything.

as a people pleaser, this is hard for me.  very hard.

also hard for me is to ask people to do things for me, so imagine how much i hate having bridesmaids.
first i have to guide them towards dresses.  which is a no-win.  If you pick one dress, they will invariably all hate it.  if you tell them they have free reign, they have to search high and low and waste tons of time.  I chose middle of the road - directed them to david's bridal and a specific color and length...  but even that is hard - they still have to take time out to go and try on dresses!

and then the shower...  they have to throw me a party.  oh, how fun for them!  oh wait, its not.  i feel horribly that people are spending time on this thing and that its surely causing them some level of stress as its just one.more.thing...

I petitioned my future husband to nix the whole bridal party thing but as a boy who dreamed about his wedding as a child (yeah, role reversal in a serious way here...) the idea of not having his friends all there with him was hard...  and it did occur to me that the entire responsibility of the shower would fall on my sister's shoulders if i didnt have a bridal party - so, torture one person more or 4 people less?  though, really, maybe my sister is more tortured by having to work with & around other people...  i dont know - does it help?  does it hurt?  who knows...

this all is way harder on me than trying to stay on budget in manhattan could ever be.